I am a more of a scutterer than a shambulater, but I LOVE THEM

Posted by Lizzie on 06/08/12

1. To pretend-jog across a crosswalk as the light changes. “Karl gunned his Porsche at a straggler with the gall to shambulate instead of hurry.” See also: Rundition (jogging in place at the corner); Dartisan (makes own path through stopped traffic).

Raise your hand IF YOU ARE A SHAMBULATER. Or fake-raise it while wondering when the refreshments will be served.

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Sadly, not a lot of Pleasurrection to be had of late

Posted by Lizzie on 06/01/12

1. The realization that someone you assumed dead is still alive. “Stu felt a flush of pleasurrection as he saw that a beloved author whose obit he thought he’d read had released a new novel.” See also: Moriginate (to begin the rumor that someone has died).

Latest THAT WAS A WORD I WAS SURE DIED IN 1980!

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For all my friends who just wrote out checks for $4000 to have their children supervised on turf

Posted by Lizzie on 05/26/12

1. A kid-driven family schedule. “Hortense double-checked the ménagenda to make sure Kimmy was at Thespians when she had to pick up Hank from Taekwondo.” See also: clannuity (regular child-related expense, e.g. summer camp).

Latest That is a Stepstool in that Illustration Apparently!

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Reader Roundup: People who are trying to steal my job, Part II

Posted by Lizzie on 05/24/12

I love all your THAT SHOULD BE A WORDS! Here is the latest group of stop stealing my job reader submissions!

CONFUSIONIST
One who takes comfort or finds truth in the complex, the nuanced, the sloppy. Synonyms: Grayshader. Fenceposter. Betwixtee. — Lise F.

SELF-DEPRECREDIBLE
A self-deprecating remark meant in jest but taken seriously. —  Adam L.

AMBIGAMY (n), AMBIGAMOUS ( adj)
The confused state between marriage and divorce, or singlehood and marriage. Also: the relationships in that ill-defined state. “When Allison started dating between walking out on her marriage and filing for divorce, she thought she should celebrate her AMBIGAMY, but there were no gifts from Tiffany’s or Hallmark cards to help her transition. When Allison’s son asked her about the status of the man she had starting sleeping with, she answered succinctly: AMBIGAMOUS.” — Alice T.

DITHERTATION
Fretting about completing or defending treatise. “Writing my dithertation put me in a state of deep despair.” Also: Boastdoc: Claiming legitimate bragging rights after receiving degree. PhD-Fad: Pursuing your doctorate only because all your friends are also; proconfessor: Academic who pledges to be fair, balanced and non-partisan. — Warren H.

INCOMMODEICADO
(in-cuh-MODE-i-ka-doh), adj.
The state of being in the bathroom without one’s cell phone. — Greg D.

PISSTANCE
1. The distance between the seat and the toilet water. 2. One’s posture when trying to avoid sitting on a public toilet seat. ”The boss asked the contractor about the pisstance on the new toilet, because it would influence the seating arrangement near the bathroom door. After all, the greater the pisstance the louder the sound of the pee hitting the water.” — Edit B.

Keep those submissions coming!

 

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The Anarchists and The Tourists Unite

Posted by Lizzie on 05/19/12

20120519-134545.jpg

1. To impede traffic, by vehicle or foot. “Sharnette nearly leapt over a fire hydrant to avoid the wall of tourists who liked to bloccupy the front of Macy’s.” See also: Slowgle (to reduce one’s speed to get a better look).

Latest That Should Be a Word!

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With thanks to Mz @Janedelury, consummate editor-by-Prius

Posted by Lizzie on 05/11/12

20120511-184149.jpg

1. A job that comes with no salary but has the promise of advancement. “An internship at Vogue offered Margot a great povertunity.” See also: Premunerative (the employer’s pitch); Swallet (to grimly accept).

Latest That Should Not Be Something We All Have to Accept Sigh

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Always be sure to do this in different groups, so you get credit

Posted by Lizzie on 05/06/12

flipocrite

1. One who openly justifies doing what one can’t abide in others. “Elaine knew she was a flipocrite for tailgating a Chevy, when she had gone just as slowly the day before when teaching her daughter to drive.” See also: Mequivocate (to argue the action is not contradictory).

Latest Word Should Be a Word!

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At the request of a friend who insisted the MAN should be emphasized

Posted by Lizzie on 04/27/12

Dramaneering

1. Maintaining control by always seeming to be in crisis. “After the dramaneering Julian wept over his girlfriend’s threat to break up with him, Gwendolyn gave in and agreed to marry him.” See also: Theratrooper (friend who swoops in to commiserate).

Latest  This is A Word As of Now!

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A medium amount of reciprocal amigration is recommended, though less fun without the days of listening in on calls

Posted by Lizzie on 04/22/12

palbatross

1. The disliked friend of a friend. “Ilene lamented how Laura’s palbatross work B.F.F. always insisted they eat vegetarian.” See also: Embad (a palbatross that is always invited); Amigrate (to become better friends with the new friend).

Latest That Should Be A Wor

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What generally precedes L’esprit de L’escalier #thatshouldbeaword

Posted by Lizzie on 04/13/12

flaudit

1. Pointed insult masked by praise. “Ginnie’s mother-in-law greeted her with her perennial flaudit: ‘It’s nice to see you looking rested for a change!’ ” See also: negatiate (to respond in kind); relinquash (to kindly deflect); winsult (the reigning dig).

Latest I Have Needed This Word for A While.

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The City That Reads and Makes Up Words: That Should Be a Word, Baltimore Edition #thatshouldbeaword

Posted by Lizzie on

My dear and VERY HANDSOME FRIEND John Barry, founder of Baltimore’s excellent New Mercury Reading Series, sends along this entry:

new mercury

Scrawltimore, spatial reference: A zone within which one is capable of realizing that the street art at the corner of North and Charles was made by the art student who flunked your Joyce class. See also: ad-junked.

As a former resident adjunct I can affirm THIS HAPPENS NOT INFREQUENTLY. John and I, with our respective mates, also once lived in identical apartments in a brownstone that had actually been bought in one of those no-money-down mortgages by someone CLAIMING TO BE SOMEONE ELSE. She ran the place, from another state, for YEARS. He wrote about it somewhere, and I will post it once I find out where.

(You can also check out Re:education, the blog of THE VERY BEAUTIFUL Edit Barry, John’s wife, among other things, which takes a REVOLUTIONARY STAND on public education. John, you may be peeved about having to share this publicizing space, but I did put it in parens.)

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I realized only after creating this I’ve been duvious FOR YEARS

Posted by Lizzie on 04/07/12

Delicious Phytoplankton - NYTimes.com

1. Feigns knowledge of a topic by expressing doubt. “Every time the baby cried, Charles duviously told his wife that he knew it didn’t need to be fed.” See also: Fraudience (those convinced).

That Should be a Word!

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I found you could describe almost none of the families of those I love as traditional, but I HATE the term non-traditional. So I turned that frown upside down!

Posted by Lizzie on 04/01/12

Kinnovators

1. Pioneers of nontraditional families. “Sam and Mark debated which made them the best kinnovators: adopting their daughter, donating sperm to Sandrine or taking in Mark’s mother-in-law.” See also: Daddicts (stay-at-home dads); clanarchists (unmarried, child-free couples).

Newest That Should Be A Word!

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Email is the problem #thatshouldbeaword

Posted by Lizzie on 03/24/12

What Would Henry Miller Make of the 1 Percent? - NYTimes.com

1. To obfuscate in an attempt to clarify. “Jim realized he had confluded his apology after explaining to his date, for the third time, why he said she looked tired.” See also: Condrone (to agree too much).

Latest  That Should Be a Word!

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I would probably try to eat this illustration, too #thatshouldbeaword

Posted by Lizzie on 03/16/12

chowse

1. To absent-mindedly peruse the food in your proximity. “The meal took a nosedive when Ellery unwittingly chowsed her father-in-law’s penne.” Also: bitrayal (finding that food tastes less delicious than it looks).

Latest That Should Be a Word!

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Also, in honor of Passover, an FB-generated list of words for a) people who wish to be Jewish and b) people who everyone always thinks are Jewish who are not #thatshouldbeaword

Posted by Lizzie on

In vague order:

Wishraeli (Lizzie S.)

Jew-ish (Many)

Oyim (Lizzie S.)

Faux-sher (Kate T.)

Wanna-heebs (Joshua S.)

Judoephilic (Shannon S.)

Wouldeos (Lizzie S., ESPAGNOLA)

ADD YOUR OWN, YOU HEWOOS!

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People who try to steal my job; Or, other great entries in #thatshouldbeaword lexicon.

Posted by Lizzie on

These are from Claire S. PLEASE SUBMIT YOUR OWN!

I am very, very fond of Flaberet.

Credibull:
cred-i-BULL, n.
Unbelievable claims made by one who is considered to be an authority. “Sheila listened politely as her boss raged over Obama’s “death panels,” but deep down she knew it was a load of credibull.” See also: im-poster girl/boy (one who publicly supports a philosophy or cause he or she does not actually follow).

Yawpportunist:
YAWP-per-toon-ist, n.
One who takes any slight pause in a conversation as an invitation to speak at length. “Faculty meetings were always a frustration for Nancy, whose hesitant contributions were often interrupted by Shirley, the resident yawpportunist.”

Flabaret:
FLAB-er-AY, n.
A burlesque show featuring corpulent performers. “All week Herman had looked forward to feasting his eyes on taut flesh at the visiting burlesque show, but it turned out to be a real flabaret.” See also: buff-fey (a large public gathering of gay men with chiseled physiques).

Please also review this group effort: http://www.theoldhag.com/in-the-original-it-was-handed-her-son-the-swiffer-because-i-dont-even-menable-by-speaking.html#comment-357678

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In the original, it was “Handed her son the Swiffer.” Because I don’t even Menable by SPEAKING

Posted by Lizzie on 03/09/12

What’s Your Dog’s Favorite Restaurant? - NYTimes.com

men-AY-blur n.1. One who promotes the patriarchy. “Never a menabler, Sara made her son Swiffer the house each week.” See also: Menclave (male-only meeting); malefeasance (act of misogyny); menopoly (exclusive male control).

Latest If There Is Any Justice In the World Those Vaginal Wand Legislators Will Have to Use a Catheter Shortly.

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Because I have always HATED the term “Grammar Nazi,” as it makes NO SENSE, unless Jew-killing means an adherence to precision

Posted by Lizzie on 03/04/12

The Secret Lives of Dogs - NYTimes.com

(Gruh-MAN-doh), n., adj.

1. One who constantly corrects others’ linguistic mistakes. “Cowed by his grammando wife, Arthur finally ceased saying ‘irregardless.’ ” See also: Dictaplinarian (enforces correct pronunciation); Spellot (takes a red pen to all documents).

Latest That Should be a Word!

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I still don’t understand why you all sit on your phones. But I’ve made a word for it nonetheless: #thatshouldbeaword

Posted by Lizzie on 02/26/12

Mencken’s Bedbugs - NYTimes.com

1. To call someone by sitting on your phone. “Kelly was mystified by the distant peal of Sandra’s laughter until she realized her friend had bumerang her.” See also: Subtlebutt (a conversation you must move to the edge of your chair in order to hear).

Latest That Should Be A Word!

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